Narci cooks about as even-headedly as she does everything else, so here’s the legit “recipe” I made up as I went along.
Of variable spicyiness. If you like things mild, put few or no peppers in. If you like things medium, put about half hte peppers in the blender, and half the peppers in whole. You’ll use them to make delicious salsa. If you like things spicy, use more peppers, or blend all of them and mourn your lack of salsa.
For reference, I blended 3 chipotles, two jalapenos, and 1 poblano, and the resultant spice level was “flavorful but not really hot, with a pleasant after burn”, 2 stars out of 4.
3 pounds of boneless pork lol butt lol, untrimmed. Cut into chunks about the size of tennis balls
2 cups or so of chicken stock
1 16 oz can of chunked pineapple
half a small can of chipotle peppers in adobo sauce
1 (or more) poblano pepper
splash of apple cider vinegar
cinnamon (“some shakes”)
oregano (“slighty more shakes”)
bay leaves (2)
pepper and salt (“some”)
A white onion, roughly chopped
5 or so cloves of garlic
splash of olive oil
Remove the seeds/stems from the whole peppers. Keep the seeds if you like things spicy. Keep the stems if you want some kind of weird pepper trophy to love and cherish forever.
Blend in food processor:
About half the onions, more if not making salsa
Some amount of the peppers - more for spicy pork, less if you want to make salsa.
the olive oil
Chop until it’s a paste, not like, some creepy liquid. Food processors are pretty powerful stuff.
Add to crockpot:
Cubes of pork
The juice from the pineapple
the vinegar, oregano, pepper, salt, cinnamon, bay leaves
the food processor stuff
any leftover whole peppers, cut in half.
Basically everything except the pineapple chunks, yo.
Cook on high in crockpot for 4 and a half hours.
Open it up, die of spicy porky deliciousness.
Add the pineapple chunks
If making salsa: Remove the whole peppers and fish out the chunks of onion and some liquid, put back in food processor with more garlic and lime juice. Blend until delicious. will it blend? Fuck yeah it will blend. It also is a nice seasoning for making Guac if you’re making guac and spoiler: you should make guac.
Cook for another half an hour or so.
I ended up with a ton of extra liquid, I just strained it out and reduced it to make marinade. I think I used more broth than I recommended though. if you want to make spicy pork broth, use extra!
Leave a reasonable amount of liquid, then pull the pork into strips using two forks.
Serve however you want. I made tacos. You should probably make tacos too, because there ain’t no food better than tacos. Serve with Taco Stuff like tomatoes if you’re gross and onions if you like onions and cheese if you’re no one’s fool because CHEESE and lettuce because I like a nice healthy vegetable and refried beans especially if you’re having a vegetarian over for dinner oops. Vegetarians should not eat the pulled pork.